People do not despise a thief if he steals to satisfy his appetite when he is hungry, but if he is caught, he will pay sevenfold; he will give all the goods of his house. (Pro 6:30-31 ESV)

Two key principles that have literally become extinct in our culture are discipline and consequences. All you have to do is watch our political presidential process disintegrate in front of us to prove that there is little consequence or discipline to choices, attitude and how we talk to one another. But if the neglect of consequence and / or discipline is this blatant in the public eye it is on intensive care unit when it comes to the home.

The problem is not so much our kids, but the complete neglect of parental discipline and consequences to actions and choices.  It is clear that many parents have no idea how to raise kids – they laugh when their kids are rude; they make excuses when kids are caught treating others badly and parents try and use their kids bad behavior as an excuse to get free money to sue schools for stopping them for bad choices and attitude towards teachers and other students.

Proverbs 6:30-31 paints a very different picture in the case of those who act badly towards others, even if it is out of desperate need. The reality is that there is a level of understanding and even sympathy towards people even when they should steal to meet basic needs in their life. It is hard to get extremely angry with someone when they are starving or in desperate need. However notice that verse 31 does explain that even in these kinds of situations, consequence and discipline is still valid and critical.

“If he is caught he will pay sevenfold” – now in our culture this will sound absolutely ludicrous. Our culture has little or no respect for others and certainly would not accept a “sevenfold” discipline toward those whom they stole from. Notice that the text says, “He will give all the goods of his house.”  Three things to note:

1. This person is not living on the streets. They have a home and they have goods. It is amazing how many people steal out of need but they seem to have an amazing amount of “resources” that usually make the stealing somewhat confusing to those watching – if they are that hungry why would they not sell some of their “stuff” and buy food.
2. This person is still responsible for their actions. We have a “syndrome” or “affliction” or “medical condition” for everything… I do mean everything. While I do believe there are legitimate medical issues that create immense problems for people, we have to get back to the idea that people are actually responsible for their bad behavior.
3. The consequence for their stealing is to pay sevenfold. Back then discipline almost always involved the perpetrator not only paying back equally what they stole but they added to it so they would also pay for what we might call “emotional damages” inflicted on the victims; they paid back above the actual damages to restore and repair to the victim for their actions. In some aspects this is penal.
4. The person must pay out of their own resources what they stole. I don’t think they had to worry about insurance to cover the damages back in bible times. While I have insurance myself for several things there are times that I wonder if insurance is really the right way for our culture. The way to teach someone their actions and (bad) behavior has consequence is to actually have consequences that are consequential (sorry for that but couldn’t help myself). Discipline (or some might say punishment) can be a deterrent if it is truly discipline with consequences.

And some parenting thoughts or … suggestions:

1. If kids steal or break things make them pay it back. I think it is dangerous when kids have no consequences to their actions; our habit of “blowing it off” and minimizing their bad behavior (and ignoring consequences) is a pathway to destroying our children.
2. Parents are the key to helping kids learn to respect others and their “stuff”. If parents would help their kids experience consequences (in love) where they had to pay their siblings back, or sell off some toys to pay back the teacher for breaking their stuff, they would actually learn not to do it.
3. Discipline is both a loving teaching moment and a restraint. Consequences are marvelous to help kids get the reality that bad choices affect others and that is not ok. If left unchecked it is amazing how much damage one person can inflict on a host of people as they grow up (and I use that term loosely) and keep on exploiting others. In a culture that thinks spanking is abuse, consequences are a critical piece to disciplining our kids in the way they should go.